I’ve been re-reading entries from a dead blog, and found an entry on chocolate fondue. I wrote it in 2004, and I’m happy to report that I’ve come a long way. I hope you find it helpful.
How NOT to make chocolate fondue
Use milk chocolate. Do not look up a recipe in advance. Add coffee cream, not whipping cream. When it seizes into a giant ball of goo, try adding butter. Throw out butter because it smells like ass. Use margarine instead. Stir. Pour mixture into fondue pot and eat with fruit. Notice that mixture is separating into grainy gooey chocolate mess with oily sludge on top. Throw the mixture out and eat fruit by itself.