I confess that I’ve never made boozesicles, though I have made some pretty boozy granitas. The thing with freezing alcohol is that, well, it doesn’t. At least, not in a residential freezer, which doesn’t get as cold as a commercial freezer. Depending on how boozy the mixture is that you’re trying to freeze, you’ll have varying degrees of success.
What is freezing, really? Freezing occurs when water goes through a phase change from liquid to solid. In order to do that, all the little water molecules have to find each other and pack together nicely.
Think of a group of friends where there’s some underlying sexual tension. You know, Marie likes Scott and Scott likes Marie and everyone at the table knows it, but Scott and Marie are trying to be discreet. What this actually means is that they sit really close together and touch each other on the shoulder and laugh in a non-cheesy way so that you’d be blind not to know that they’re into each other.
Water mixtures—like juice, iced tea and lemonade—freeze reasonably well because the primary liquid is still water. When you throw alcohol into the mix, then the alcohol molecules interfere with the packing of the water molecules. Kind of like what would happen if Juan, Marie’s super sexy ex-boyfriend showed up and sat between Marie and Scott. Exactly like that.
So can you make boozesicles? Well, yes and no. If there’s a little bit of booze, you’ll be okay. The boozesicle might be slushier than you’re used to, or melt faster than normal.
But it’s a fine line.
Add too much booze and you’ll just have a boozy slushy. Which is probably not a bad thing, but you can’t eat it with a stick. Or on a stick. You could, however, eat it with a spoon. And hey, when your biggest concern is whether to eat a boozy slushy with a stick or a spoon, you know it’s summer and life is good.